Michael Jackson: A Conflicted Man-Child?
June 27, 2009 by John Hoyle
Filed under Celebrities, Featured Article, Music
Michael Joseph Jackson, “King of Pop” and rock music icon for nearly forty years, suffered cardiac arrest and died Thursday June 25, 2009, at the age of 50.
Michael Jackson died because his heart unexpectedly stopped working, and when it did his death took everyone around him by complete surprise. A few of his friends suspected he was ruining his health by overwork and over-medication with pain pills – but none expected that he would actually die from a damaged heart.
But maybe Michael Jackson’s heart was damaged in many ways, many years ago, back when he was still a very young child.
In 1965, Michael’s mother, Katherine Jackson, became a Jehovah’s Witness. Katherine had always been very religious and a Baptist, but on the suggestion of a friend began to study with the Witnesses and fully accepted the teachings of the Watchtower Society as her new faith. Her husband, Joseph, never became a Witness, but apparently allowed her to raise all of nine of their children in her new faith. Daughters Rebbie and LaToya, as well as her son Michael, became the most active Witnesses in the family. The rest of the siblings either became inactive or simply quit the religion when they became of age.
In an article written for BeliefNet.com in 2000, Michael described his childhood this way:
“More than anything, I wished to be a normal little boy. I wanted to build tree houses and go to roller-skating parties. But very early on, this became impossible. I had to accept that my childhood would be different than most others. But that’s what always made me wonder what an ordinary childhood would be like.”
Many of us who were also raised as Jehovah’s Witnesses can relate to what Michael was trying to say. It is almost impossible to have a “normal” childhood being raised within a very controlling religion. As a Witness child you’re discouraged from playing with the neighborhood kids, you can’t join the Little League, or engage in high school sports.
Going to school for a Jehovah’s Witness child presents constant choices, issues, and teasing because they won’t salute the flag, sing the National Anthem, celebrate the other kids’ birthdays, or engage in any activity that relates to a holiday. 
Singing in the school chorus or glee club, or playing in the orchestra, presents obvious problems around Christmas and other national holidays. After all, how can you be in the marching band and not play the National Anthem?
Plus, there is the fact that as a Jehovah’s Witness child, you are going to be discouraged from going to college or university. So why waste your time taking all those college-prep courses in science, languages, or mathematics? There’s no reason at all to try to earn a scholarship if you’re not going to try for a college level education.
Michael Jackson was faced with all of those issues, plus being forced into becoming a full-time entertainer at the very early age of ten. In his home, father Joseph was clearly the boss and tough disciplinarian. Joseph could be a very harsh taskmaster; Michael and his brothers were expected to practice their music at every opportunity – they had little or no time to play or just kick back and be normal children.
On Friday and Saturday nights, when all the other kids were home watching TV, going to movies, having dates, or spending time with their families, the Jackson boys were performing in local bars or making concert appearances in other towns.
For Michael, only Sundays offered some respite from the career being forced upon him by his father. His Sundays were dedicated to the other master in his household – his religion – Jehovah’s Witnesses.
Michael continues his description of his early life (again quoted from the BeliefNet.com article):
“But what I wanted more than anything was to be ordinary… [Sunday] was the day I was able to step away from my unique life and glimpse the everyday… Sundays were my day for ‘Pioneering,’ the term used for the missionary work that Jehovah’s Witnesses do. We would spend the day in the suburbs of Southern California, going door to door or making the rounds of a shopping mall, distributing our Watchtower magazine. I continued my pioneering work for years and years after my career had been launched… Up to 1991, the time of my Dangerous tour, I would don my disguise of fat suit, wig, beard, and glasses and head off to live in the land of everyday America, visiting shopping plazas and tract homes in the suburbs. I loved to set foot in all those houses and catch sight of the shag rugs and La-Z-Boy armchairs with kids playing Monopoly and grandmas baby-sitting and all those wonderfully ordinary and, to me, magical scenes of life. Many, I know, would argue that these things seem like no big deal. But to me they were positively fascinating.”
Later on in his life, Michael seemed to develop an almost eerie passion to be with young children. He had relatively close relationships with Emmanuel Lewis, the diminutive star of TV’s “Diff’rent Strokes,” and Macaulay Culkin, the child star of the “Home Alone” movie trilogy, both much younger than he. He described his connection and special attraction to young children this way:
“[When I witnessing]…the funny thing is, no adults ever suspected who this strange bearded man was. But the children, with their extra intuition, knew right away. Like the Pied Piper of Hamlin, I would find myself trailed by eight or nine children by my second round of the shopping mall. They would follow and whisper and giggle, but they wouldn’t reveal my secret to their parents. They were my little aides. Hey, maybe you bought a magazine from me. Now you’re wondering, right? Church was a treat in its own right. It was again a chance for me to be ‘normal.’ ”
We all have to grow up eventually and face the realities of life as adults. Unfortunately, Michael Jackson never really grew up, and it seems clear that he did not want to. His body continued to grow, but by restricting his body’s natural development (he was reportedly 6-feet tall with a body weight around 120 pounds – about 60-70 pounds under norm), removing all or most of his body hair, and always speaking in a low volume, high pitched voice, he tried to remain a pubescent teenager. One observer commented that Jackson, either by design or because of psychological damage, essentially stopped growing socially at age 14.
You may look younger than you really are, but society’s norms do not look kindly upon middle-aged men who are obsessed with associating with young, unrelated children. Forty-year old male babysitters are not in high demand, but this is exactly what Michael Jackson wanted and tried to be.
His creation of his Neverland Park on his estate in Santa Barbara County, California was designed specifically to draw young visitors to his home. It’s true that many of these children were suffering from diseases and some were from poor or disadvantaged neighborhoods – and it’s also true that many were accompanied by a parent or guardian. His young visitors and those who accompanied them described their time at Jackson’s Neverland as “happy, fun, unique, much like going to Disneyland.”
It was Jackson’s obsession to be close to young unrelated children that eventually got him into serious trouble in the early 1990s, and formally charged with felonies in 2003-2005. He eventually paid out millions of dollars in one case and barely managed to survive his criminal court case in 2005. It is true that Jackson was found “not guilty” of all charges by the jury in that case, but in the court of public opinion he would be found guilty and punished severely for his behavior and poor judgment over the last few years of his life. His reputation and wealth would never fully recover from the damage inflicted during that court case.
Jackson’s closest friends and family continued to support him in spite of the accusations plus several incidents of allegedly inappropriate behavior with other people’s children. Most of them still expressed their feelings that Jackson was treated unfairly and punished for his totally innocent and kindly acts toward children. Almost everyone that has been close to him personally remains adamant that Michael Jackson would never hurt a child – simply because he loved children and loved being with them.
My own opinion (which is of course is “Just One Opinion”) is that they are right. My opinion has changed somewhat since his court trial and I now doubt that Michael Jackson ever intended to molest or hurt a child in any way.
I do still hold the opinion that his social development was retarded by the excessive discipline he received from his father, Joseph, plus the lack of normal social development due to his Jehovah’s Witness upbringing by his mother. It should be obvious to anyone that is paying attention that the man did not have a “normal childhood.”
We all see our life through our own eyes. Inside, I am still 20-years old and 145 pounds – but what I see every day is a 200 pound, 65-year old man in the mirror. That’s not me! It can’t be!
Michael Jackson’s own song hit, “Man in the Mirror,” touched on this phenomenon to some degree. I think that when Jackson looked in the mirror he saw a boy in his mid-teens – thin, hairless, beardless, and youthful – and he tried very hard to keep himself that way in reality.
When he was with young teenage boys and girls, he acted out his own childish fantasies with them, playing their games, singing their songs, acting silly and being stupid. He was trying to remain ageless, unchanging, just as he would have been when he was still a teenager.
During the trial, Jackson was accused of having pornographic magazines hidden away in his house, and this evidence was suggested as being proof that he was a child molester. But for all of us who were teenage boys, especially in the 1950s and 60s – didn’t we all sneak Playboy and Penthouse magazines into our rooms to share with our friends? Weren’t we curious about naked women? Didn’t many of us growing up in the 1970s and 80s have posters of Farrah Fawcett (rest in peace, Farrah) in a wet bathing suit hanging on our walls or on the back of our bedroom doors? Didn’t we hide our “dirty magazines” between our mattresses or under our junk in the closet so our mother’s wouldn’t see them? Remember sitting around with our friends and sharing nasty, gross, or sexually charged jokes that we had heard?
I think that is what Michael was really doing. He was reliving the teenage years he never got to enjoy like the rest of us – he was too busy working, traveling, and making money for his family. No wonder he busted away from the Jackson singing group and went out on his own at 18.
I must say that I was a fan of Michael Jackson during the peak of his career. Not a devoted fan, but still a fan of his music, an admirer of his many talents, and a fan that was cognizant of his many good works and philanthropies.
I was also very disappointed in Michael Jackson. I disliked his self-indulgent spending, the way he managed to snatch the Beatles’ music catalog away from his friend Paul McCartney, and the self-destructive damage he did to his face and body with constant plastic surgery.
To look at that handsome young man on the cover of “Off the Wall,” or the attractive, and athletic performer in the videos of “Thriller” and “Billy Jean” – and then compare the disastrous cumulative results of all of his facial mutilations twenty-five years later – was truly sad and heartbreaking for me.
So who’s to blame? I can not judge all of the players in Michael Jackson’s life. His father, Joseph, certainly had much to do with what Michael became, both professionally and psychologically. Katherine, Michael’s mother, made choices for herself and her children that clearly resulted in their socially dysfunctional behavior and unhappy relationships. No one can grow up as a Jehovah’s Witness child and not be scarred socially and psychologically; many of us manage to get over it and go on with normal lives – but Michael Jackson? Probably not.
Of course, Michael must share the blame and take responsibility for his own actions. His friends often tried to steer him away from his obsession with being around young children – but he wouldn’t listen.
His friends and business associates tried to rein in his excessive overspending and poor investment choices – but he wouldn’t listen.
Many doctors and surgeons counseled him against undergoing further plastic surgeries because of the damage he was doing to his face and health – but he wouldn’t listen.
And now he’s dead. Michael Jackson, the talented singer, dancer, performer, song writer – “The King of Pop” – is dead.
And now he’s dead. Michael Jackson, the generous philanthropist and friend to so many people, no matter their race, religion, creed, background, color of their skin or their disease – friend and stranger alike – is dead.
And now he’s dead. Michael Jackson, the young child that was never allowed to be normal, severely disciplined by a sometimes cruel father, raised as a Jehovah’s Witness by a mother caught up in a cult, denied the normal teenaged relationships that we all cherished – the little boy that never really grew up to be a man – is dead.
So Michael, we’re all so sorry that your damaged heart stopped beating and that you have left this world forever. But whatever your eternal destiny might be, no matter where you may end up, may you rest in peace…
Click here to go to the original BeliefNet.com article by Michael Jackson
@John Hoyle -
Whatever was in MJ’s will is what should be done. He saw fit to leave his children in her care (she’s 79, it won’t be for too long) and Diana Ross is the next in line to the children. Sorry, but we can’t say: oh, they were raised in such and such religion, we have to keep them away. Most religions have aspects of them that can be intolerable. Would this discussion be going on if Katherine were say Catholic? Jewish? Probably not. Ex JW’s are not the only ones going to therapy. Ex-Catholics, you name it, are in therapy a lot of the time. Anytime a religion is taken by any one of it’s followers to an extreme is not good. No one would give a rat’s ass if JW’s didn’t go door to door. It’s the fact they intrude upon our life that we don’t like. If Katherine Jackson were Amish (talk about cutting yourself off…) this discussion would be headed in another direction. I know, I know, I’m going to hear about all the awful stuff JW’s have done. I know. I was raised one. I have left. I don’t like the idea of his children being raised that way either, HOWEVER, this is a free country the last time I checked and freedom of religion, no matter HOW nutty it may seem, is the law. Thank goodness. I only feel the law should step in if it physically endangers a child’s life. But if we want to start going down the road of : well, they should be protected from that religion or that way of life… well, then, wait till someone comes and takes your children away or gets involved because of their perception of your religion, faith, lack of faith, whatever.
SOCKPUPPET
I’m really sad about what had happened to Michael Jackson. I like his songs namely those which are very emotional. I’m a Jehovah’s Witness for years now. I really appreciate what i have learnt till now on god and his wills. My familly have not put any pressure on me. I have gone to school as a normal children and planned to go to the university. I’m a teacher and I have learnt how to keep a balance between my religion and my professional life. I enjoy sharing what I’ve learnt with others… Jehovah is god, how can he be cruel. Besides, he has given lots of advices like not to take drugs or to engage in an immoral life. That’s beneficial. Who will want his son to be drug addict or AIDS positive. How can God steal one’s childhood when he has himself created that. The Watchtower society never forced anyone to form part or to be a witness … I’m only 20 and I have great respect to god principles that doesn’t affect my social life in anyway… I’m well educated, I’m thinking about marriage, I have got a wonderful childhood with my familly… I have got thousands of friends of different community whom I love sincerely. If I continue this comment it will take thousands of pages. There’s only one thing I shall say. Things appear how we want them to… Opinion differs but the truth is only one… Do not foolishly accept what anyone told you, verify it first…………
SOCKPUPPET
I can’t help but notice some JW writers apparent difficulty with basic English. Perhaps they should spend more time on lessons and less time knocking on doors.
I have never been a JW.
SOCKPUPPET
I’ve noticed some have mentioned the fact that those that speak kindly of being one of Jehovah’s Witnesses must be newly converted. My wife and I are both third generation Jehovah’s Witnesses and our children are being raised as forth generation. I hold no position in the congregation other than as a publisher, which means like Michael I preach to people about my beliefs and occasionally give talks.
That being said, both my wife and I have had very difficult childhoods. My wife’s mother raised her as a single mother who died when my wife was thirteen. I was raised, like Michael, by a domineering, obusive, perfectionist who beat us all regularly. We were also a family of nine so the sensitive ones got lost in the shuffle. At a young age I was molested by a non-witness relative and to this day continue to deal with that trauma.
I am alive and well with a beautiful family because I have a relationship with Jehovah that is complementary but separate from any earthly organization. Michael knew the truth as he was taught and I know for a fact his wishes are that his children are raised as Jehovah’s Witnesses. I pray that this is the case because news reports have already indicated that Joe has his eyes set on Paris, Michael and Blanket being his next gravy train.
Michael will be resurrected without the vitaligo and plasic surgery but more importantly the freedom to travel the world singing praises to Jehovah for free as simply Brother Jackson. No crying, fainting, hero-worshiping fans but rather servants of Jehovah that appreciate the beauty of song in his honor.
My only hope is that Katherine and Rebbie can successfully raise the children free of the lecherous, self serving media vultures led my Joe Jackson.
Of course this is just one opinion.
@Bill – Bill, thank you for your honest and well written comment about this article.
I think you, and some others, have made a very valid point about the influence that the Jehovah’s Witnesses’ religion has on children. I can truthfully attest that my parents, who were both faithful Witnesses from the time I was 9 years old, were very loving and dedicated to the success of their children. As was very common for that generation (1950s-60s), they would often yell at us and spank us when they felt it was deserved, but we were never abused or mistreated. In my family, even when the discipline was very severe, we never doubted for a moment that our Mom and Dad loved us. Unfortunately, many of my other JW childhood friends did not fare so well and grew up with many social and mental handicaps.
One reason that I look back on my childhood with some fondness is due to the fact that my father chose to ignore some of the more stringent rules of the Watchtower Society. He not only allowed my brother and I to play sports with our non-Witness neighborhood kids, he encouraged it, even allowing my brother and me to play in Little League and school sports teams. My brother went on to win a state high school championship and won a college scholarship due to his talents as a tennis player. But we were the exception to the rule even fifty years ago. The Watchtower Society has never seen the benefits of competitive sports or socializing with non-Witness neighborhood kids – and has tightened those guidelines even more in recent years to the detriment of many young JWs.
At the same time, we were expected to go to all three meetings, go out in field service at least twice a week, and to participate in Theocratic Ministry School. My parents even encouraged me to read the Bible and any other historical literature that I wished on my own. I actually owned my own copies of the works of Josephus and Alexander Hislop before I was fifteen, something that would be denied to most JW children under current Watchtower rules. Even then, I was very much the exception to the rule.
Dick Kelly (co-editor of Just One Opinion) had a completely different experience growing up as a Witness kid during those same years. His parents were the JWs that studied with my mother and father, converting them into the JW faith. Dick’s childhood was so conflicted at times that he wrote Growing Up in Mama’s Club: A Childhood Perspective of Jehovah’s Witnesses to share some of his painful experiences as a JW child. I can truthfully state that Dick was a far more talented athlete than either my brother or I, but his parents absolutely refused to allow him to participate in any organized sports or school activities because of their interpretation of JW rules.
So yes, Bill, many Jehovah’s Witnesses (both past and present) can honestly report that they had wonderful childhoods with supportive and loving parents. I still have many fond memories of going to meetings, traveling to the 1953 and 1958 International Conventions, summer vacation pioneering, and giving public talks. I had many wonderful JW friends that I still miss to this day. But again, I can assure the readers of this article that my childhood was very much the exception to the rule – even then. Since then the Watchtower Society’s rules have become even more restrictive – and someone like my father, who chose to ignore the rules about our engaging in sports and school activities then, would probably be facing reproof and possible serious disciplinary action as a JW – now in spite of all of his years of faithful service.
I’ll end this comment this way: I left the religion when I was in my twenties even though my parents and then spouse were still active JWs. When I left, I never considered going back and I was determined not to allow my children to be baptized as JWs – and they never were. Both of my parents remained active and faithful JWs until they passed; I was somewhat estranged from them after 1981. Only my sister remained a Jehovah’s Witness. Although we love her and her family very much, my brother and I would not trade our non-JW lives for hers for anything.
My firm decision not to allow my children to be raised as JWs was the SINGLE BEST DECISION OF MY LIFE – for them and for my very happy, talented, involved, athletic, and amazingly intelligent grandchildren.
For that reason, I cry for what Michael Jackson had to deal with in his later years. He had many religious friends of all faiths, but outside of his own family, hardly any active JWs would give him the time of day and were often very critical of almost everything he did or accomplished. I sincerely pray that his children are not allowed to be manipulated into becoming little JW clones. I love them too much to ever wish that curse upon them.
@John Hoyle – Thank you for a response that is both balanced and truthful. Too many times when Jehovah’s Witnesses try to explain their beliefs and heartfelt convictions they are attacked with many baseless rumours, lies and regarded as ignorant and stupid.
You do however have to admit that we are no longer in the fifties. My greatest fear is that they will be manipulated and taken advantage of exactly like Michael. They have no need for money as he has lovingly provided them with more than enough money. My prayer is that they grow up like Jackie and John Kennedy Jr., successful but restrained and undeterred by the demands of the masses.
However, this world will not allow that to happen. Paris, Michael and Blanket unfortunately are about to personally experience what Michael hated so much.
@Bill – I’m afraid that you are right, Bill. At my age I may not live long enough to see the final act of this particular play. I really do hope that those three beautiful children will somehow get through all of this and find their way, as you so perfectly illustrated, like Caroline and John Kennedy, Jr. and fulfill the real legacy of humanitarian charity and understanding that their father was trying to achieve in his own imperfect way.
True, it is no longer the 1950s, but in some ways I wish that the Jehovah’s Witnesses would return to that “golden era” in their past when they were only known for their big conventions and persistent door-knocking – not their strict shunning policies and irresponsible protection of child molestors.
yop people mi name is kensa and im 12 years old im not a michael jackson fan(we’ll i wasnt before) when he died i suddenly became fasinated by his life history im not bein mean but his death cause intrest from all over the world its like the biggest pr stunt on record
Thank you Kensa (from the UK) for commenting on our Michael Jackson article. I agree that his memorial celebration was a little over the top, but it had me in tears on more than one occasion. Despite his often bizarre and self-destructive behavior at times, Mr. Jackson was undeniably a very talented entertainer and his music brought a lot of joy to listeners all around the world. His charitable works and wide circle of friends would indicate that he was a good person inside in heart and meant to do good things. But, like all of us, he was imperfect and sometimes made some very unfortunate decisions that got him into a lot of trouble. Let’s hope his children can do better and build on his legacy.
Oh give me a break! I’ve just recently been baptized as a JW of which has not been a year yet and glad I did! I was raised a JW but went with my parents. When I got old enough to make choices and decisions for myself I found that other churches were only preaching/teaching what the congregation wanted to hear, not what they should actually “know”. The JW’s facts are based “solely” on the bible and the bible only. It is not our words, but that of Jehovah God. What we choose to do with our lives and/or choose to become simply boils down to the “choices” we make for ourselves. It has nothing to do with being pressured, but everything to do with having your own voice and to make your “own” choices despite who thinks what about it.
@Linda ,
As the writer of the Michael Jackson article, I can assure you that everything in that article is true and based on confirmed facts. Not only that, but I was raised a Jehovah’s Witness and I have family members who still follow that belief.
I’m happy that you feel comfortable with your choice to become a baptized JW. My hope is that you will find it to be the right choice for you. But what you say and how you say it brands you more as just an unquestioning follower of the religion rather than someone who has seriously studied the history, facts, or – I’m sad to say – even the Bible.
JustOneOpinion.com is not intended to be a forum for specific debate over particular religious beliefs. However, because the Witness religion was such a critical part of Michael Jackson’s conflicted life, we felt it appropriate to address all of the issues involved.
Linda – may I suggest that you, or any of our other readers who might be interested in following up on this story, and its connection to Jehovah’s Witnesses, should go to Ex-Jehovah’s Witnesses Online and read more about the ramifications of Michael Jackson’s death and funeral. Direct link to Michael Jackson article.
I was raised a JW since I was 1 years old. I decided to leave when I made 18. But I am here to tell you that the religion does not stop you from playing sports or playing with children your age. You can go to college. I have neices and newphews who have gone to 4 year colleges and they are JW. I left because I did not want to follow the rules. But you know I was the one that would go door to door in NY. I am married and live in NC but when my children go and see their grandmother they love to attend the hall. I have a brother and sister-n-law in NC and when they have special talks or the memorial me and my children will go. When I sit there sometimes I kinda miss the teaching or the songs they sing, but it all comes back to me. So this thing about MJ having a hard time with the religion is not true. He was being pulled from both ends father one way and mommy the other. That is where the confusion came from.
Congratulations to you John. If this is not the most commented upon piece ever on JOO, I will be surprised.
@Raquel R – thank you soooo much for that honest HEARTFELYcomment on Michael Jackson ,and yes bros i feel the same way ,Jehovah forgave Manasseh ,and yes Jehovah reads our imperfect hearts every second!!!!he alone knows our hearts he saw everything Michael has been through,and how he tried to get in service even after his worldwide fame and fortune.i for one was crying with tears of joy when i saw them going to the KingdomHall with poor Katherine who must feel so stressed ,and needs so much love from us all who believe !Your letter was the most nicecst one i ahve read and i have read a ton this past few weeks!!!!i choose to respond to some as well and use my Bible when i can to help people to realize how simply human he was !!!!May Michael rest now for alittle while longer in the best place ,InJehovahs memory!!!!please feel free to email me ,i really enjoyed the way you wrote with such kindness ,yes this is the way Jehovah is!!!!!
@Bill – Thanks soo much for your thoughts brother ,i agree ,what abeautiful time for Michael this will BE FOR HIM ,HE WILL BE FREE AND BAABLE TO ENJOY HIS LIFE AND HIS 3 BEAUTIFUL CHILDREN WHOM HE DID Love so very much ,i am glad during his very private funeral those 70 sang Life Without End at last!!!!He will see ,all that he once shared the truth with others will come so true and yes he will simply be as he once was Bros .Jackson.thank you for being nice…it is arefreshing change
Actually , he did not suffer a “Cardiac Arrest”
Michaels Docter Conrad Murray , claimed that when he found michael , he wasnt breathing but had a faint pulse, this means that his heart was still beating! obviously you cant have a pulse without a heartbeat, their for its was respritory arrest, therefore , they should not have been doin CPR at that moment.
Something strange went on , also conrad murray failed to mention that he left michael on his own after giving him propofol !!!!
Michael will be missed dearly! always in our hearts michael ! watch over us!